After almost a decade of playing Smash Bros, allonby and myself are going thoroughly insane waiting for the Brawl to come out. In an attempt to quell our anticipation down to manageable levels we will be giving our opinions on the characters that made it into Brawl and the new levels we’ve seen so far.

Bowser
fink: Bowser was fun to play in Melee but with the potential for Gigabowser in Brawl…well, fuck yeah
allonby: Bowser is one of my favorite characters, so much so I intend to name my dog after the antagonistic sonofabitch. I’m extremely happy to see the spiked collar wearing koopa king return this time around, and the thought of terrorizing my opponents as Giga Bowser has me down right salivating.

Capton Falcon
fink: Falcon is a classic character and has always been fun to play and this wont change for Brawl
allonby: Falcon has always been fun to play, but he has never been one of my favorites (maybe cause he can’t swing a bat :P). I truly hope he still sounds like Napoleon Dynamite versus a tether ball while executing his up B. “YES!”

**UPDATE to Falco**

Diddy Kong
fink: Not really that excited for diddy, I don’t think I will hate to play him but his moves don’t appeal to me at all, plus that final smash looks pretty shitty
allonby: I have to agree on the final smash comment, it failed to impress. However we must remember, mo monkey, mo problems.

Donkey Kong
fink: Unlike diddy, I’m always happy to play as DK, his power moves are fucking sweet and usually annoy the crap out of people which I always enjoy
allonby: “Donkeeeeey PUNCH!” Nevermind how hilariously satisfying it is to land DKs special, the monkey brings it, and brings it hard. Ground slap FTW! Somewhat torn on the final smash… not sure how useful it’s gonna be.

*updated*
Falco
fink: Fox’s clone has always been ok but for some reason is a complete dick to play against when he is a computer player, not sure why but it makes me hate him
allonby: Falco is a cunt. Fuck him, Fuck his laser, and fuck his Chuck Norris kicks.

UPDATE: The Dojo posted falco’s move list today, and it looks like his play style won’t just be a slower/stronger clone of fox anymore. While still being similar, his fighting style seems to have changed, and he now has the ability to actually kick the reflector away from him and at and enemy. neat.

Fox
fink: If you want to be a jerk, then get good with Fox, that being said he is still a good character
allonby: Fox is a cunt for the same reason Falco is a cunt, only he is a faster cunt. I can’t decide if that is a good thing, or a bad thing. Down B edge deny FTW. “BOOM! Go back to yer mama!”

Ganondorf
fink: I always enjoy giving somebody the dorf and I’m loving the idea of his Ganon final smash
allonby: “The Dorf always brings his A game.” I’m pretty sure that was one of his taunts last time. pretty sure. Seriously tho, Gannon hits like a truck, and if that axe kick didn’t take so damn long I might use it more.

Ice Climbers
fink: These guys have always been weird to play with but still fun but I do hate their eternally moving level, its just fucking annoying and really it doesn’t take skill to win on it, just jumping
allonby: Ice Climbers! WTF were you doing in melee anyways? Don’t get me wrong, I love the uniqueness of this character(characters?), but why this one of all the NES games to choose. Anyhow, their final smash looks painfully devastating, +10 to you.

Ike
fink: Ike seems like an alright character but the Fire Emblem guys from Melee were one dimensional so I’m hoping the same isn’t true for Brawl
allonby: Marth looked like batman last time around. Oh wait, we’re talking about Ike? oh. =P

Jigglypuff
fink: I have never really liked the jiggly, probably because I can’t master the one hit kill move with him so yeah…fucking jiggly
allonby: Jiggly SMASH! I hate this little… thing, but not nearly as much as everyone else hates me when I play him. Down B! Down B! PING!

King Dedede
fink: Now this should be an interesting new character; kirby’s ability to float but in a heavy weight, should be sweet
allonby: I’m a big fan of the heavy weight characters, so I’m quite glad to see an addition to their ranks. Dedede really interests me, sounds like he a combination of DK and kirby, good sauce. Walk tall and carry a hammer. I hear he sucks too.

Kirby
fink: Always enjoy killing people with a fluffball, always will
allonby: Damnit kirby, why can’t you kill anyone?! …who’s house? Game and Watch Kirby’s house.

Link
fink: Has been my character of choice since the original, very glad to see his final smash doesn’t suck
allonby: Link has always rocked hard, its a universal fact. Nice to see they have mixed his play style up a bit with the addition of the Gale boomerang, but really, I expect more of the same from him, and that is a good thing.

Lucario
fink: I know next to nothing about this pokemon but from the videos I’ve seen he looks better then Mewtwo so its all good
allonby: Don’t know much about this thing either, but I hear his power goes up as he take damage, so the closer he is to death, the harder he hits. That should prove to be an interesting new game mechanic.

Lucas
fink: Not really sure I care about what looks like a Ness clone but he could be different and therefore less annoying…who knows?
allonby: Ness with no YoYo? Fail.

Luigi
fink: His controls are annoying but his flying sausage move is funny. Also, his final smash makes no sense and sucks ass
allonby: Luigi gets all kinda shit from everyone, short end of the stick and all that, and maybe that’s why I like him. His up B kicks ass if you land it right, and I can’t resist rocket sausage. I’m gonna have to disagree on the final smash front. From the Dojo:

When you trigger Luigi’s Final Smash, funky world music fades in and the immediate area gets wrapped up in the Negative Zone.

Opponents who set foot in the Negative Zone are plagued by a random assortment of effects including:

* Drastically reduced attack power
* Greater launch distance when hit
* Increased likelihood of slipping
* Steady increase in damage percentage
* Flower growth on head
* Dizziness
* Uncontrollable taunting
* Sudden sleepiness
* Decreased movement speed

…And so on.

That actually sounds pretty badass.

Mario
fink: I’m gonna miss Dr. Mario but Mario is still sweet
allonby: Classic sauce. Mario’s throws pwn all but the most seasoned smashers.

Marth
fink: Still will probably be one-dimensional but still beats out crap characters like Pichu
allonby: It’s Batman!

Meta Knight
fink: Kirby but with armour and a sword…very fucking happy with this guy
allonby: I can’t wait to try him, it’s like they took all the suck away from kirby and made him totally Metal. I am assuming of course that he can actually get some kills. …I want a cape.

Mr. Game & Watch
fink: Bacon attack makes me eternally happy, happy to see him back
allonby: Nothing makes me happier than that little air pump thing he does when you hammer on A, except maybe the “plick plick plick” sound of him walking around. Seriously though, I could never really get good with him, i’m mostly glad he is back so I can still enjoy the side effects of kirby devouring him.

(Part 2, with the rest of characters, coming soon)